To Obadiah
To Obadiah - Book Presentation and Music, 2020 (Work in Progress) • 4:14 minutes •
Some text portions are rather fast: please do not panic or be frustrated, the pdf has all of the prose, and you can read/experience the book at your own pace. The audio/music from the presentation is sampled from the video footage I took the night of the oratorio. Listen to this angel and listen to what I heard. As of now, I see this video as a tool to be used for the presentation of the book. I plan to use the audio soundtrack as part of an installation in a gallery to create a soundscape. Certain prints/sequences on a wall, Installation of artifacts, and some small videos installations I am working on would also be used to aid in a multi-sensorial experience for this body of works. The Book is planned to be Hinge-Bound ,with a black soft leather binding with gold letterpress and gold trim on the pages. The same size as my hymnal from my elementary school.
Book Mock-Up
Photoshop Book Mock-Up: Black Leather-Bound Book, Gold Letterpress title and Gold Trim design details
Selected Spreads - Full PDF Book Dummy Available Upon Request
“This visual and written diary is a letter to Obadiah. You know who you are, you are reading this right now. You are Obadiah. They are Obadiah. I am, and I am not Obadiah.
I am for I say I am. I am not for it is not a complete truth.
After hiding from myself for over twenty-one years, my life rapidly changed when I met Obadiah. It was through Obadiah; I began to learn more and more who/what/how/why I am.
I thought it would be easier to assimilate into a life of normalcy. This work and my queerness came bursting forth from me uncontrollably, and it bled into every facet of my existence after a dam of scabs began to tear.
This work scared me—it still scares me, but not for the reason it used to. It scared me before because I was trying to bury these feelings and thoughts for so long due to my own shame, it scares me now because I ever thought I needed to hide in order to survive.
I feel this book is a scream and a whisper all at once. I had archived and put away most of these images because I did not want to face them. It has radically changed my perception of self, my beliefs of what a photograph should/could be, and what Obadiah stands for.
The inception of the work was a reaction to a relationship, which in hindsight, was not what I had conflated it to be. It is analogous to my previous sense of self. These relationships stem from my interactions with others. For in finding the connection I craved after feeling so lost, I was able to see more of me. The downside, when Obadiah leaves, Obadiah tends to take part of me with them, so I must search again to pick-up where I left off, filling the puzzle, piece by piece.”